Five days into the new year

and I don’t really feel any newness

maybe that’s because I don’t remember what was in the last year.

This morning I made it to the office earlier than usual. As I was going down the stairs to get a painkiller, I felt some sense of newness. The sunshine felt fresh and new. And something stirred in my heart.

It is crazy how so much can happen in our imaginations in one little moment. I felt or saw flashes of things I want to achieve and might work for this year. I am not so sure what I want in this new year.

Maybe I will spend more money on my appearance by getting my nails cleaned and my face taken care of a few times. Maybe I will find means to do at least one project in church.

I am not sure how important these things are for me. I am sure I want more cash, better housing and a comfortable life for me and my loved ones. My heart is really set to making life better for others.

I have been feeling this urge to do social projects very strongly the past moths. But I don’t fully trust this feeling. I wonder if the feeling or the urge will go away. I don’t want to really talk about it, because I am not sure how I want to do it and where to start.

There are two other projects I want to do for the Haitian Community in Suriname. But I haven’t worked on them yet. I am also waiting for my new room. My brother is putting really hard work into finishing our parental home.

It is quite funny. This will actually be our second parental home. We had one in Haiti. We’ve spent so many years living in rental homes in this country and now we are finally getting our own. I am excited to the max!

My room will be a little resort for me, as I love being alone. Solitude is really important to me. It allows me to reflect and brew out creativity and other important things. I am easily distracted. So I think having a better space/room will definitely push my personal productivity.

I will take almost everything as it comes and prepare what I can.


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