If you can’t, love, I’ll pray

And whisper all our fears away

I’ll carry our burdens like they’re all my own

And show you love like you’ve never known

If you can’t, love, I’ll cry. And kiss every doubt out you’re eyes

My hands will hold our worlds, like their only mine

But remember you promised me, love. That our love is forever and there is nothing we cannot do, as long as I am here with you.

So if you can’t, I will.

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Lest my eyes get used to the dark

I’ll follow you everywhere

To illuminate you with the faintest spark

you see, the song of mating birds know not yet such a vibrant dance

the satisfied moon knows not yet such a devotee

And the knight knows not yet such a bride

As clean

as bright

And as determined as I cherish you.

I guess I am thinking about you
If the sun doesn’t go down
I’ll be alright
because I’m thinking about you

Guess I’m thinking about you
If the moon doesn’t come out at night
I’ll be allright
because I’m thinking about you

Guess what, I am thinking of you
If the earth decides to leap around her axis
I’m still good
because you are as much here
as you are not

I am as much with you
as I am without

Who I am

Who I am? I don’t always have an answer to that question. All I know is that at times there’s a lot of mumbling in my head. And I can’t figure out who on God’s planet earth is speaking and what is actually being said. 

Some days I thirst and hunger for achievement, as if that is what I need in stead of a breath. And now and then. Though very rarely, do I come across a silence. That surrenders ages and constellations to speak. Not knowing where it cometh from, nor where it descends….I pray for peace with an empty timetable in my hands. 

Nobody knew what I was doing there. I felt like an accident. As if a series of unfortunate events had occured that forced me to be there. It was no secret that I was not welcome. And my understanding of life at that moment, or my lack of it, did not help the matter. I existed. And co-existed. Felt like I was thriving, making my life count for something and going somewhere meaningful. It is crazy how a lie can seem so real. And then the heavens took a deep breath, sighed a deep sigh and decided it was enough. I was made free. But the pain of recovery still echoes through the cracks. Time. Heals all wounds? I am moving on, still. But I am ever so watchfull. Lies start sweet and always seem surreal. Until the heavens decide to sigh and breathe.

While I am standing here, wondering if this is yet anothet crossroad, I realize I can’t make the same choices I made back then. Not only am I not the same. The truth shines and lies seem to glow. Where have I seen this before. And another truth is, I can’t hold hearts that I don’t know. But I do want to hold this heart of yours. I know what is happening, we are falling apart. If only you’d just admit it. Without your signature bias.