A minor nuisance, love

There is this minor nuisance
They seem to call it love
It has likely fallen down around me
And is closing me in

It all started
With a second thought
A second glance
On your second glance
On everything you have embodied

They seem to be together
They seem to hold eachother
And guide eachother
And that exactly
Is what separates us from them

We have,
How do I put it,
We have become,
No, we have not become
But we have faded
Into nothing
Nothing but perhaps
Nothing, but maybe
But impossible

There is this minor nuisance
I used to think
They called it love
But it is just that you don’t know me
And none of the above


Lovely you and wasted me

I’ve been hearing your voice. All day today. But I haven’t got the guts to answer in my own. Actually, the listening has been here for so long I don’t remember when it started. But I guess today is another day to answer.
I miss you a little. You know, the fiction about us. The dead and haunting what if, that grins down on us.
So dearly enticing. Though I wish I could drag you along and trip over our feet on our way. I breath a big bag of air and turn away. The drought under my skin is painless though. The drought of your absence. In accordance to my dreams, you should have been here. Here, right now, under my breath taking time in. But yes. Yours is another smile I won’t give into.
Though I see the little boy in you. It’s the kid that got me. I don’t even think I’m into you. It’s your inner-kid, bare-butt, that’s gotten to me. The little guy that wants more, keeps holding his hands, palms turned upwards, towards me. Not like I can wait. That is what the turning away is for. The impatience, the lack of understanding, the pack of lies we’ve build ourselves around. This realm, this stupid, illegitimate realm of you and I. It’s a farce. You and I, we both know it. But it brings the most beautiful smiles to our lips and gives the greatest promises of paradise to our numbed senses. Though my senses are ever-awake to this. But you get to be free. Though you keep lying to me, turning away as if you don’t know what is going down from time to time. I still see your soul and laugh away our foe. You get to escape and even run away. But me, if I wanted, this could be my empire. My own little sun-ridden goth castle where I could spend loneliness smiling to the grey brick industry walls, feeding on memories of never occurred past participles.
I wonder how I will be able to turn away from you with everything that reminds me of you. The music, the words, the lies we told, your name, your favorite colors, your tasteful words, the cunning smile of your little guy. I’m in a mood to tell the truth, so don’t try to find me. I’d have to turn off all the lies we’ve been lit up by. Your arms and their embrace, your mouth and the breaths they take. Everything I’ve seen in you. All the times when my phone will ring, when I’ll text again. When I will lie again, tell truth again. Face my fears, be brave again and feel weak again. How will I turn away from you. So everyone can breath. How I made you special and you made yourself special to me. I’ll remain great, with or without you though. That much you know.
Feeling like a fool I do. Laughing cynically, suffering clinically. Inside and out of you. Let me wait, make me wait until this disease is over? The paintbrush of the sky is fading me away from the canvas. The lustful, false and enigmatic canvas of a couple that died before they met. The nemesis of lovely you and wasted me.

Flirting with my mind


Flirting with my mind
Tickling my senses into a sweet escape
Inviting my arms to an in-depth embrace


Flirting with my mind
taking me away
wavering the silent cries of my mind
Off to forgetful goodbyes

Are teasing
tricking my heart
into believing
the world is beautiful
they cause me to keep dreaming
Dreams that don’t make sense
dreams that will only keep my eyes opened
Without showing anything real

whenever they fall
they’re just flirting
With my mind