If a jar breaks it could cut

If a jar breaks, maybe it could cut

Jars are not known to be made for cutting. The goal of their existence is geared towards service. They were made to fulfill a need and to the pleasure of the customer or user.

Jars can break. And then it is the end of their life/existence as we know it. And when they break, they can no longer supply the need for which they where essentially made. They continue to exist, or rather their parts exist. To most people they then become useles.

An artist could put their remains to use for other purposes that could also be to the pleasure of customers and the artist.

At the end of the life as we know it, the jar transforms and is able to serve other purposes, depending on the user. One of those functions is to cut. Yet, no one would intentionally use a jar to injure or cut. The cut can happen if the user is not careful or has not been able to take enough caution to put the remnants away that can cause a cut or injury.

Yet, this doesn’t take that possibility away. The function is there and was created out of what we would call malfunction.

Maybe this is the same for our emotions. We all have emotions. We’ve learned that emotions are neutral and can be seen as a sensor to gear our attention towards a need we might have.

When we don’t know how to manage our emotions, we might injure our souls. This way the emotion has been used for a different purpose than it’s original one.

It may take some time, but this broken jar story is my way of encouragement to learn how to deal with our emotions. We may experience them as painful or pleasant, good or bad. But first of all, we must learn that that experience does not have to be absolute. Remember, emotions are there to call out a need within us that needs tending to.

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I mend the cracks

And tend to the wounds

But yet, at the end of the day

Every sore seeps somewhat

For I always end back up at you

My child

For as long as I can remember, when thinking of my future self, I pictured myself with a little girl, a mini me.

And then one day I realized that I didn’t think up a present father for this girl.

I used to think that picture was an accurate view into my life, many years down the road.

But just recently I thought that maybe this isn’t true. Maybe this little girl is my inner child. And maybe that picture was a means to show me that I will discover my inner child.

You see, we all have an inner child and depending on how our childhood was, this inner child may reflect trauma. Most of us have gone through some form of trauma. Maybe we had a mean family member, or got trapped in a closet by accident and developed claustrophobia or got scared by a clown. No matter what it is, each experience is valid and needs to be addressed. I am by no means an expert, but I do know that we cannot compare our experiences.

This led me to think. Your inner child might be your first child. The first one you have to take care of to make sure you are a healthy adult/human being. And (maybe depending on the type of trauma that impacted our inner child or not) we have to take care of this part of ourselves our whole lives.

The reason for this can be found in the fact that unresolved issues definitely seep through and affect our daily lives. If we don’t learn how and when to adress our different emotions and expressions thereof, we might malfunction.

I encourage you today to take a look at your heart, are you healthy, are you happy? There are plenty ways to find out what to look for. Be mindful that what isn’t broken does not need fixing. I believe that as human beings, such wonderful creatures, there is always another way to pour out the best of ourselves into our world. So if you see something about yourself you would like to improve from a place of love, I encourage you to find the tools and love the heck out of yourself.

You will be grateful. I am on a journey to be a wholesome woman. Somedays are filled with good moments and others tend to be overshadowed by fear. But nevertheless, I try and go back to the Love that is for me, in me, around me. It is the right ‘juice’ that I need to go on.

Everyday

I want to love you

Like nobody’s ever loved before

I want to hold you

As if I’ll never see you again

But I know you’re not asking me to bring you the moon

You just want an everyday heart to love you and keep forever

I know I don’t want you to promise me diamonds and gold

But I just want your everyday heart to love and keep me forever

I want to make it

I know we can take it

Love to live with you

Life to be with you

Sometimes I wonder

when will my surrender be complete

when will I give my heart fully

and not reel it back in

when will I say ‘here I am’, stretching my arms open wide

and not turn back around into my own embrace

sometimes I wonder, how will this life of mine unfold

if I keep keeping on like this

and then I realise

it is not by might

nor by power

But by the Spirit I run away from