I summoned spirits and ghosts
in hopes of finding you
’cause maybe you had lost your heart
in the rages of this crazy world
where nobody really knows
what they’re doing
where they’re going
or who they really are
But not even they
dared set foot
in my den
………..all the walls broken into
all doors jolted open
every inch screaming your name
no corner free
the ceiling unhooked
the floor uprooted
what I had to do
what it took
what is meant to be
always come back
So they say
our names will be called out together
when the last
of the broken hearts are named
What is this story
you told me about loving me
What is this lie
you fed me
About being here for me
What is this confusion
I cannot shake
about you leaving
in the middle of the storm
you single-handedly brew
I’m getting tired of this
Of your image kissing my eyes before the sunlight gets to
Of looking for you everywhere
Without seeing you all day
Tired of this.
How much of my sad eyes
Have ever done as little as haunt you
How much of my fragile heart has ever done as much as call on you
My bare shoulders
Take pride in knowing
You have something
Called a touch
But I am getting tired of this
Even the birds sing in a sadder tone
You don’t even know
I took my heart out and hung it
On your sleeves
What’s the use of carrying it around
If it doesn’t want to remain in it’s chest
And keeps running away
To someone else,
Refusing to respond to my
Attempts to revive it
And turn it back to me
Pieces of us clash into one another and catch fire, burning away what is left unsaid, blessing our nostrils with the stench of crushed roses with honeybees.
I pull myself together, but every time two of my many pieces meet, it stings, sending my flesh off in a million more frenzies. I find myself looting the future of our happy memories, it seems I don’t have what it takes to take today with a smile. My beautiful smile you used to like so much.
I can’t wait for you until I am perfect, the day is dawning and night is leaving with every peace of mercy there was left for me. They say that sorrow lasts in the night, but turns into joy with the mornings. I have yet to turn my tides around.
Our pieces, remnants of the never ending us fly off together in flames. Clearing the path for you without me and me apart from you.
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A beautiful girl with dreams….
When my heart ain’t enough
The Father reminds me
There is much more I can give
In her dreams, her hands are open
All chains are broken
And the sky isn’t further to reach
She is still
A beautiful girl with dreams
When it’s hard to love
One love is ever enough
Reach to the Father
He is love for the broken
She’s still his daughter
If the doors to my heart aren’t open…….
She is still A beautiful girl with dreams
My hands may be small
But for her love
heaven’s heart has been broken…
Sometimes it’s hard to stay committed to love. Growth and maturity both are a process and while we’re at it, we will go through hard times and often we will fail. But it’s important that the other party doesn’t give up. Doesn’t give up on love between two but also self-love. It doesn’t make it okay for me to hate you and snare you, but if I should lose myself and fall short, you are not supposed to sink. Sometimes people become so dependent on the love from others and meanwhile they haven’t developed their self-worth, that one little crash makes their world fall apart. Don’t let that happen to you. I have fallen short. I have been falling short a lot these days and in the future, some days I might still fall short. Because maturity and growth have different levels. But if others fall short on me, I will not sink. Not again. So I want to teach those that I love and those that I am not committed to, to love themselves first.
Don't give up on me
I wonder why you let your heart slip
Glide into this unknown, slippery shadow land of hurtful lies
I loved you, I did
I cared for you and my heart gave itself with my full consent
But you snatched your heart from me
after all those years of deliberately loving and sharing
Now I know the door of your heart was unlocked and that all the love I bestowed on you fell,
fell hard on the ground after your two hands got too full to hold against me.
I still love you, I do
My heart is devastated at your brutal escape
I don’t know how and I don’t when, but I am hoping for your comeback.
But while you’re at it; your pretentious revolution, I hope I learn how to meet you halfway, so all those
years, all my heart, all my love and my navel will not be to waste.
I still love you, meat of my flesh.