I want to give myself to you. Continuously. Because I know then I’ll never run empty. Looking at you feels like turning to the light. A warm hug for my soul, comfort for my feet. I want to continuously pour out myself over you, just because it’s you. And because of the quiet love in your eyes, the firm grip of your cherishing hands. Because you, almost like the moon towards the sea, leave me free to rise and fall. And I’m falling for you. Continuously. And rising with you, faithfully.

A song slipped up my sleeves

It got my telling stories about you

Got me explaining how you make me feel

And what I’d do for you

A song slipped up my sleeves

It took me by surprise

Changed my directions

And led me straight to you

And everything I wouldn’t do, should I ever come to lose you

I wrote a song

To tell myself I wouldn’t wanna make it

If I’d be without you

To tell myself my prayers have been answered

When you came into my life

Zoals het licht van de zonnestralen de aarde bereikt

Jouw lippen, mijn slaap-wakende bovenrug

Zoals zeewater eendrachtig en kwispelend rotsen afbrokkelt

Jouw vingertoppen, de huid van mijn dijen

Net hoe de bladeren zich aan het onzichtbare overgeven en laten meevoeren

Mijn hart, jouw geest

I am blindly

Braiding a thick thread from your shoulders on top of your chest

Down to the full length of your body

It is like an Indian braid

But white and of wool

That is how I feel us being knitted and woven together

You into me

Me into you

Becoming us

No longer just you

Or only I

Somehow a lie

But also everything I desire to live by

I thought I wanted to love you

Slow and quietly

But I guess I never realized

That’s how souls are devoured

By taking your time

Exploring every inch of your life

Every single moment

That’s why I crave your presence everyday

I didn’t think I’d want to keep you alive

Silly me, for how could we ever be reborn together as one

I need to shed my burdens and grow into my new reform

With you

What is reality exactly?

What am I doing, loving you so hard

Pouring out my being into you

An over and over emptying of my heart

Just to be filled again

With longing for more of you

What am I doing

Loving you so hard

Taking you everywhere with me

Carrying your breath in my chest

Giving you a secluded preview of who I want to be

What am I doing

What are you doing to me

I can still smell you

From time to time

As if my head is resting on your chest again

As if you’re sitting beside me again

As if you will kiss me again

I can still feel you

Now and then

Your embrace

How you looked at me with your loving gaze

Almost sure that you’re breath is one with mine, once again

Standing there

I just stand there

Like lifeless

You can cut my body open

Disect, find and add what you wanna

When you’re done,

Sew me back up

Just like this

While I’m standing

You can finish at the back

You’ll find great interest in the curves of my spine

Freely I serve to you

And when you’re done

Don’t bother sewing me back up

If it’s too much trouble

For what I can’t see is never as real as what I can see

Don’t push me forward

Not that I mind landing on my face

It’s just that there’s no other way but up to go

From there

Don’t lay me down

Foreign hands have no longer the right to my descending affairs

Just leave me standing

Right there where you found me

Where I stand in full service, freely

I will be who and where I need to be


You can miss people from the heart

You can also miss them from your skin

When your heart doesn’t want to beat as joyfully as it did when they were still here

And a certain heaviness creeps in that seems to never want to leave

When your skin wants to reach for them and feels like you will never again be safe without their touch

When you’re no longer worried about why you’re no longer together or why it won’t work

When all you want is just their arms and their heart and to go back to your ways of old

When this minute you’re upset, the next you feel in love, one instant you burst out crying and the next you’re grateful

You can miss people from your sunken sinking heart

But you can also miss them from your skin and your hands and your dreams.

And your soul.